Social investment
My latest motive for re-reading the parts of The Happiness Advantage is the book’s take on our social connectedness.
As he unpacks his core premise, Shawn Achor challenges the order of things. He suggests that a shift in perceiving happiness as a quality that helps us achieve our goals faster/easier and not thinking of it as of a reward (which makes it conditional), can give us a life-worth of advantage in everything we do.
He also tells us, and backs it up with the research data, that having a support network; knowing how to build one as well knowing how to benefit from it, is something that can transform the problems into opportunities and move us from survival into thriving. The social investment is integral to ‘the happiness advantage’ and isn’t, and can’t be, conditional either.
Yet the research shows that some people, sometimes, display a paradox (myself included!). When we are stressed or dealing with problems, when the support and connections are needed and could be beneficial the most, we react by closing ourselves off and going inwardly. This only exacerbate a sense of isolation, hardship, shame, guilt and result in even more stress and sense of failure.
What the ‘ties’ entail is not prescriptive; we all most likely have our own definition of socialising and support. However, when the going gets tough, keeping the ties with what and who matters active can be the key that transforms the entire experience.
Having had some challenges recently, this idea of strengthening, not loosening, the ties popped up in my thoughts. Intentionally, I held, the best I could, to my social ties and a sense of belonging. As I mindfully kept my heart and mind open, I could see that how the unfolding of events almost effortlessly changed from ‘bad’ and ‘sad’ to ‘better’ and ‘new’.
I got to experience my own version of the happiness advantage that brought along a sense of abundance.
Abundance of connecting and sharing.
Something I realise I can always do and have access to! After all, we all ARE those precious social ties.
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